When thinking about “respect,” I was so focused on an attitude of deference, admiration, or esteem; regard, that I was surprised to read its definition as:
A particular, detail, or point (usually preceded by in): to differ in some respect. To me, this definition connects respect to quality.
Relation or reference: inquiries with respect to a route. Of course I use the phrase “with respect to,” but I guess I forgot about it with my thoughts going to “respect your elders” and “respect the power of nature” relating respect more to awe and deference.
I’ve been wanting to play with my spirals on the lake, but living in a place that is rainy and overcast, I’ve had to be patient. As such, I respect any moment of sunlight. Thus, these images captured when the sun broke through this morning, represent respect in that respect.
In That Respect by Maria L. Berg 2022
The Prompts
NaPoWriMo
Today’s prompt is a combination of things: “Write a poem in which you first recall someone you used to know closely but are no longer in touch with, then a job you used to have but no longer do, and then a piece of art that you saw once and that has stuck with you over time. Finally, close the poem with an unanswerable question.”
Today Björn challenges us to write our poem as a riddle. I didn’t think I would try it, but my poem turned out to fit the prompt, in some respects 😊
Some Respect by Maria L. Berg 2022
The Poem
Following a Sound through a Dark Wood
A kind word or harsh A belly of jelly laughter quick to grab the wooden paddle hanging at the front of the class the cry, the smack the very first year of lessons in respect A command or request clicks and clacks of keyboards all the keyboards lined up with barely elbow room to spare as we stare not hearing the scratching pencils the grinding teeth the turning stomachs but assign them numbers we don’t hear the moans of despair, or cheers of passing success The clap of a slap The coo of canoodle faceless strangers click and clack all day we spray judgement from a distance like the splat and splash drip of Pollock’s paint, we are but numbers but not number one, not even number five, not even whole numbers like number 17A those subtle stripes like fingers plucking at destiny’s strings What does respect sound like?
This week was both surprising and challenging. My daily writer’s meditation and novel writing habit almost got me through some very freezing weather and surprise snow, and my feeling of impending doom from world politics. My morning stretching and exercise followed by meditation has really changed my relationship with my body. I’m listening to my body, and feeling like a complete system, instead of an opposing duality of mind and body that I have been for years. However, my mind was eventually worn down by distraction and horrible thoughts of “What’s the point of creation when humans are bent on destruction?” So I took yesterday off.
Set-backs will happen. I feel like giving myself a break was a healthy set-back. But only one day off and I’m finding it hard to get back into my new system. Especially since I feel a need to write more, not less. I’ve had to remind myself to be patient a lot today. Patience is everything when trying to make lasting changes and create systems of positive habits. I just started reading Atomic Habits by James Clear–I enjoyed his email course that I got through the Best Year of Your Life Summit–and plan to talk more about habit systems in my next post.
A Cold Mountain Haibun Poem Interlude
Over at dVerse Poets Pub it is Haibun Monday and Frank has challenged us to contemplate both the work of a poet from the Tang Dynasty and a physical mountain. It’s pouring today, so the mountain is not out, but I know it’s collecting snow behind those clouds.
Cold Mountain Sky
My sky is a giant, cold mountain. Even in summer its glacier keeps it white-capped. It is easy to forget the volcano sleeping inside. Like me, its heat and pressure are hidden, tucked under a thick, calm crust, for now. But it is dormant, while I toss and turn.
You shared your blanket white covering the morning a fluffy surprise
Cold Mountain Sky by Maria L. Berg 2022
Assessment
Last week was challenging. Luckily, the work I’ve done to create a daily writing habit got me through (mostly).
My weekly check-in:
What went right last week? My morning habits are really going well. I added a ten minute vocal warm-up after the full writer’s meditation and before I sit down to write. The cat absolutely hates it. It’s pretty funny. I read a thriller novel from the rather large collection of e-books I’ve collected. I’m finally excited to read one thriller after another until I’ve cleared my kindle. I can already see how I can learn both what to do and what not to do from these books. I used to have trouble finishing e-books, I guess I finally got used to reading on my tablet. I also had one night of (mostly) good sleep without the laptop!! Victory. This week, I’ll hope for two in a row. That would be amazing. But, as I said last week, I can’t try to sleep; I have to let sleep happen.
What didn’t go well last week? Russia invaded Ukraine and I had trouble concentrating on much else. I finally took a day off yesterday, and I’m not upset about it. I’m kind of amazed I got anything done at all last week. A day of distraction watching movies and cuddling with the cat was what I needed. Now, I’m ready to get back to work. I also did not meet my submission goal, but reading thrillers took priority as a novelist.
What small steps will I add this week? This week I’m adding the poetry MFA eight week program. I’ve been reading The Portable MFA in Creative Writing from The New York Writers Workshop and the poetry section interested me. Rita Gabis lays out an eight week plan of writing and reading to emulate a semester of an MFA in poetry. She recommends dedicating forty-five minutes a day to writing poetry. She also recommends breaking those minutes up into small sessions at different times of the day to explore when the optimum time is for my poetic musings. April is National Poetry Month, so I think I’ll start now, fitting the MFA program into my system. Then the second half of the “semester” will coincide with the daily poetry writing challenge. I am also going to try the Sleep Smarter Sleep Makeover again. A lot of Shawn Stevenson’s ideas have stuck with me, and now that I’ve identified some of my deeper issues, and created some good sleep habits, I’m hoping the two week program will be the extra motivation I need to get my sleep habit to stick.
Is it time to increase one of my habits? 750 words each day felt challenging, but I want to get to 1,000, so this week I think I’ll split my writing session into two 500 word sessions and see what happens.
What else did I try? I made a collection of all the thriller e-books on my kindle. There are twenty-seven. I plan to read one after the other until I have read them all.
Accountability
One area that every resource talks about is social accountability. I have found many times in the past that if I share my goals here on Experience Writing, I am more likely to achieve them.
I would really enjoy if you would like to join me in an accountability club. Every week, type your goals in the comments, or leave a link to your post and we can check in with each other to see how we did with our goals.
I tried again to do a Sunday week in review post, and again my work wouldn’t load, so Monday is my Year of Finishing Novels posts day. I am not going to waste time fighting with my internet. My time is for writing novels and reaching my goals. And sharing my progress and what I’m learning with you, of course.
Rewards
As I mentioned in my last post, a habit cycle consists of a cue, a behavior, and a reward. As I began this process of identifying the habits I would like to create, and the habits I would like to change, I found it hard to identify my rewards.
I don’t like shopping. I have everything I want and need, and I don’t have money to spend on things as rewards. I also didn’t want food or beverages to be my rewards. I felt kind of stuck. I wanted to set up these systems to reward my new behaviors, but how?
Then I really looked at myself and thought about times in my past when I was really happy. I went through a period of time when I closely associated with Tigger because I love bouncing. I’m trying to increase movement and exercise, so jumping on my rebounder (small trampoline) became a reward.
That got me thinking that many of the behaviors I enjoy that are not writing could act as rewards for meeting my small goals. With fun activities as rewards I came up with:
Jump on the rebounder
Draw for 10 minutes
Dance Break!
Go take some pictures
Stretch on yoga ball
Put stickers on stuff
10 minute meditation
Play guitar for five minutes
I was also reading Jack Canfield’s Success Affirmations and was inspired to write some phrases to tell myself I am doing great.
I wrote my action rewards and my affirmations on colorful slips of card stock paper, folded them up and put them in a jar, so when I had done my desired action, I could open my reward jar (pictured above), and get a surprise reward.
At first, when I pulled an affirmation out of my word jar and said it aloud, it didn’t feel like much of a reward. Then one day, when I was cleaning out the closet for my meditation, I found an old toy megaphone (pictured above) that has five different voice-altering settings. When I said my affirmation (any of the affirmations out of my reward jar) using the megaphone on either the high pitch, low pitch, or monotone settings, it made me laugh. That felt like a reward.
Celebrations
In Tiny Habits, BJ Fogg takes a different stand on what reward really means. He says the idea of a large reward in the future for achieving your goal isn’t going to work. You need to reward yourself instantly after your behavior (Made me think of training a pet). To do this, he chooses to fist bump and say, “I’m awesome” (Even after he flosses one tooth, since that was his tiny habit that he started with to create a flossing habit).
It’s important to send yourself that little dose of dopamine (pleasure) to get the behavior to stick. Finding what works for you is important. Fist bump and “I’m awesome” didn’t work for me. After thinking about how I respond to happy news and practicing some things, I found clapping three times and saying, “Yeah!” or “Woohoo” in a certain way, gave me a smile and a good feeling of accomplishment.
With my rewards and celebrations in place, I have the tools I need to create and solidify the small changes that will make my large goals possible.
Like the squares of Himalayan Pink Salt I’ve pinched so sparingly for years from the squat jar sitting by the coffee in the cupboard, each word can pack a surprising punch, especially when the salty bite hides in the center of the sweetest treat.
Assessment
Last week was big for me. Some set-backs and disappointments on the sleep goal, but also some break-throughs.
My weekly check-in:
What went right last week? My morning writing habit is going so well. I have started thinking about my novel the moment I wake up. This morning I ran to the keyboard so I wouldn’t forget what I was thinking, and had my daily words before I started my routine. I’m now doing the full writer’s meditation (body, heart, and mind) and getting better at sitting every day. I find that when my mind wanders, it wanders to my novel which is fantastic! I’m moving more and more throughout the day. I have fuller range of motion, and I’m pain free!!
What didn’t go well last week? Sleep is still difficult. The week’s biggest disappointment was a day and night when I felt I had done absolutely everything right, then I got into bed and it was like I didn’t know how to go to sleep. I stared into the darkness for what felt like forever. I tossed and turned and tossed and turned. I gave up and read. It felt like torture. The next day I gave in and slept with the laptop. The next day I read three sleep books. Two of them: Restful Sleep by Deepak Chopra and The Sleep Solution by W. Chris Winter explained why I had been disappointed by my efforts, and they both said the same thing: Sleep is natural; you can’t try to sleep. You have to let sleep happen. I had tried so hard, worked so hard to sleep, I had created an entirely new anxiety keeping me awake. Sounds like something I would do. But no more! This week I will let sleep happen.
What small steps will I add this week? This week I’m adding my voice to the mix. I’m going to do vocal exercises in the morning and sing and play guitar at night after I put the laptop away and before I go to bed.
Is it time to increase one of my habits? I’m happy to say I feel ready to increase my daily writing goal again. This week I’m writing 750 words or more every day. I always said I wasn’t one of those people who writes every day, but that is exactly who I am, and it’s making such a difference in every aspect of my life.
What else did I try? One of the little things I tried last week that turned out to make a huge difference, was a simple Youtube video called Vagus Nerve Reset. The sleep issues and constant state of fight or flight that my poor body has been in both stem from surviving Hurricane Katrina and the the piles of stressors after that. I never stopped being in that survival mode, until now. Since I started these small new habits of motion in the morning and meditation and paying attention to my body, I’ve noticed my range of motion improving and the knots in my back loosening up, but I also had a horrible pain in my right shoulder. I knew it was all that stress not wanting to let go; I’ve held stress in my shoulders since high school, but this was an acute pain that wouldn’t loosen up and was hurting when I tried to sleep. I was almost crying by the time I went ahead and tried the Vagus Nerve video. And I noticed a difference. That same day I did the Full body scan meditation from Jon Kabat-Zinn’s Masterclass and though my shoulder was still bothering me, by the end of the meditation, it wasn’t screaming at me. I did the Vagus Nerve Reset and the Vagus Nerve Exercises again the next day and then yesterday was my first pain free day. I was so happy I was dancing and singing around the house all day. It might be a placebo. I don’t care. I’m going to keep doing it and being so very happy.
Accountability
One area that every resource talks about is social accountability. I have found many times in the past that if I share my goals here on Experience Writing, I am more likely to achieve them.
I would really enjoy if you would like to join me in an accountability club. Every week, type your goals in the comments, or leave a link to your post and we can check in with each other to see how we did with our goals.
My goals this week are to:
Write at least 750 words of my novel every day
Add vocal warm-ups in the morning and guitar playing before bed
One story submission and one poetry submission this week
What a Difference a Day Makes by Maria L. Berg 2022
As you can see, the snow is gone. I know I said I wasn’t going to publish all my word pictures here, but I wanted to show the result without the snow, and then I did some playing indoors.
Playing Indoors by Maria L. Berg 2022
New Poem
The dVerse Poets Pub is open after a two week vacation and today Lisa invites us to write a “celebration” haibun. I haven’t written a haibun in a while, so I think I’ll give it a try.
Celebrating Release from a Beautiful Imprisonment
I saw large, white flakes fall during my white-knuckle drive home through thick rain and sporadic drivers with speeds from infrared to ultraviolet.
Ten days it snowed since we opened presents, and ate Mother’s delicious strawberry cake, everyone generous and grateful. I remained sustained.
Overnight snowmelt frees me from joyous ice jail I return with treats
When I included “abandon” as a prompt, I imagined things left behind. I was feeling that kind of abandon yesterday, but I want to leave that behind. This morning when I thought of abandon, I thought of wild abandon: bright colors, spinning until falling, rolling down hills. The surrender kind of abandon. This bliss kind of abandon.
I’ll try to bring both aspects of abandon to a poem to fit yesterday’s Poetics prompt: In the Light of Other Days.
I ask my morning what I can abandon to enable a feeling of wild abandon Worry, said the morning abandon your worries like branches abandon their leaves to the wind and I hear the lawn is getting too long and you have dishes in your sink and I remember the black grit on the gray kitchen tiles I ask my morning how to abandon all the worries I’m facing so I can feel reckless abandon? Face them with action So I mow the lawn with abandon and as the grass abandons inches I turn my ankle but I do not abandon my mission I yell the pain at the wind and for once the pain walks off when I finish and lock the mower in the shed I find that my shed keys are lost most likely locked inside the shed and while not finding my keys I notice the drip from the outside faucet drip, drip, abandoning water (and money) into the mud which is worrying
Dimensional Abandon by Maria L. Berg 2021
November Daily Prompts by Maria L. Berg 2021 Please leave your links in the comments. I hope you will join me.
Today I was inspired to try a shadow effect inspired by images I’ve seen on Pinterest. Pareidolia combined with tricks of light and shadow made for some interesting house guests.
It hides behind the fancy ribbons the glitter, the streamers it hides in plain sight behind white-toothed red-lipstick smiles is obscured by laughter and music
but then a sudden light– headlights through the window sweeping the far wall, someone leaves the bathroom or enters from the hall– and the shadows shift and I see it so clearly and then it’s gone covered again in laughter and the next song’s major chords
It hides under every plastic cup and every paper plate under every chair used to fasten a balloon I can taste it in every bite of cake there it is in the flicker of candles I smell it coming in the smoke when extinguished
It lingers longer this year as it lurks in the shadows and leaves a clingy film after the guests have gone
My days are flying by. Every day I think I’ll get more done than I do, but I’m enjoying putting extra time into this initial set-up with the intent to have everything come up again later. I started hopping around a little bit yesterday, and that helped me get motivated to go back and continue the scene from the day before.
How’s your writing going? How do you get and stay motivated?
Why the Long Faces? by Maria L. Berg 2021
November Daily Prompts by Maria L. Berg 2021 Please leave your links in the comments. I hope you will join me.
So far, so good. My prompts are inspiring me to hop out of bed, grab my camera and try new techniques. When I woke up, I made a quick list of things found in the wild that I forgot to put on my abandoned property description yesterday. This included: spiderwebs, spiders, huckleberries, salmon berries, ferns, maple trees, etc. The list of these details made me think of a set of screw-on macro lenses I bought a while ago and only tried once or twice. I set my camera to macro, grabbed the 10X lens and the 4X lens, and set out into the wild.
The world was very cooperative. It temporarily stopped raining and a little morning sun peeked out from the clouds occasionally. The leaves held lovely droplets. I was hoping to find one little shriveled up huckleberry clinging to the tree, but instead found many tiny huckleberries hanging on. They were delicious crispy, juicy treats. What a nice surprised.
Today I am wild as wild as a huckleberry after the first frost a crisp, tart-sweet burst as wild and fresh as raindrops collected in the yellow petals of a buttercup among ferns as wild and fresh and vibrant as light breaking through the thick gray to reveal threads of spiderwebs from sori dot to sori dot as wild and fresh and vibrant and dangerous as thorns hiding entwined on blackberry vines weaving through it all like sharp fangs behind plump, closed, smiling lips ready to prick any bit of vulnerable bare skin that comes too near today I am wild
a huckleberry after the first frost a crisp, tart-sweet burst raindrops collected in yellow petals of a buttercup among ferns light breaking through the thick gray clouds to reveal threads of spiderwebs from sori dot to sori dot thorns hiding entwined on blackberry vines weaving through the underbrush like sharp fangs behind plump, closed-smiling lips ready to prick any bit of bare skin
In the Light by Maria L. Berg
Veins by Maria L. Berg 2021
NaNoWriMo
Yesterday I made the Miso and Squash soups I had been planning, so my meals are only a matter of quick warming for a while. I had forgotten all about my word count sticker sheet and bingo card, so I have some fun stickers to put on things today. Hopefully that will get some fun motivation started.
Writing Exercise: As my warm up today, I’m going to keep Chekhov’s gun in mind today and make a little map of everything I’ve set up in my opening scene: All of the props, sounds, people, etc. that have been brought to the reader’s attention as important and brainstorm how they may be revisited and build toward the climax of the story.
Yesterday, during the BARN writing group, a new member mentioned Wild Writing with Laurie Wagner, so thinking of today’s photo prompt, I looked it up. It consists of 15 minute hand-written writing sprints, writing as fast as you can. Sadly, I press hard even when I try not to, and do not write very quickly. But I do write faster when hearing the tick of my kitchen timer, so during my morning pages this morning, I will attempt to write as fast as I physically can and hope it leads me to bi-passing my inner critic and get to my intuition and instinct.
Whiskers by Maria L. Berg
November Daily Prompts by Maria L. Berg 2021 Please leave your links in the comments. I hope you will join me.
For Tourmaline .’s Halloween Challenge, carve, I went to grab a carving knife from the knife block, but it was missing. Mr. Skeleton had gotten to it first and had gone on a skeleton candle murder spree.
Unlike yesterday, I had a lot of fun this morning, and everything worked the way I wanted it to. My photo shoot was inspired by the original Halloween movie (affiliate link) poster.
I have really enjoyed this photography challenge this month. Not only does it get me up and active first thing, with creative production before breakfast, it involves crafting and engineering. I’ve enjoyed how the different prompts have worked together, so the graves I didn’t finish one morning, filled out the graveyard on another morning. There’s been a nice balance of creating scenes inside, outside, and bringing the outside in. I’ve tried so many new things and feel like I’m mastering some new techniques. I’ve also explored my space in new ways and appreciate all of my Halloween decorations for their versatility.
I found these one-word daily prompts so inspiring, I plan to continue during November. For NaNoWriMo I’m working on a thriller novel called “Abandoned Property,” so I’m creating prompts to go with that theme. I’m working to come up with prompts that will be as inspiring as Tourmaline .’s Halloween Challenge has been.
Killer Shadow by Maria L. Berg 2021
Halloween Slasher by Maria L. Berg 2021
OctPoWriMo
Today’s prompt, “Tea,” took some thought, but then I thought of charming elderly ladies which led me to Arsenic and Old Lace and I thought of the practice of reading tea leaves for divination, and decided tea would fit in nicely as spooky inspiration.
Finally split in two I’ve broken through to the gooey bits where dualities splash and clash in banality a mystery of flesh starving to carve
the protective coating cracked, gives and crashes around the periphery as sharp edges glitter in steel in jittery fists from shivery spinal nerve trickery
contradictory cleavage poking at pains hoping for gains by slicing and dicing then displaying the gore as horror torn and shorn from its safest hiding places
the conditionality of sanity sliced by a skeleton’s carving knife in the morning light dazzles momentarily before it scares me and I put it away.
The Other Slasher Comes to Play by Maria L. Berg 2021
Slasher Protege by Maria L. Berg 2021
And after I thought I was done taking pictures, kitty went to learn at the feet of the master slasher. Of course, this was meant to be a secret transaction, so he ran off the moment he saw I was taking pictures.
For Tourmaline .’s Halloween Challenge, creature, I experimented with an effect I noticed when I started to play with bokeh in the mirror: it’s possible to take a photo of a filter both right side up and upside down. These are my first experiments with the effect, but I got some fun results.
Tentacles by Maria L. Berg 2021
OctPoWriMo
Today’s prompt, “Speaking and Listening,” reminded me of all of my children’s story records my parents brought me a couple weeks ago. I think I’ll spend some time with them as I write today. The headless rider has some funny lines.
For Today’s Poetics challenge at dVerse Poets Pub, Lisa requested Halloween themed poems about irritating human attributes. That seems to fit well with today’s creatures. I don’t think I’ve tried the Duodora form before.
Headless
Human creature I’ve never come down so far with you before and heard. Don’t forget those roars in the night! Ibbity-Bibbity-Zibbity-Zab Every hypocritical word a trap
Human creature where monsters did last rise you have to believe in them to see them Pull off its disguise! Ibbity-Bibbity-Zibbity-Zab This is a headless monster you can’t nab!
For Tourmaline .’s Halloween Challenge, “drink,” I bought yummy, colorful juices and repurposed my candy mold as an ice tray. The drink photos did not go well. I made a terrible mess and I’m going to have to deal with a drunk alligator and zombie later, but I like how the candy pumpkin shots turned out. Making shots for a zombie, what was I thinking?